Double Coverage: Week One
Vikings @ Saints
Cameron: Saints - There are murmurs of a repeat being heard around the bayou and beyond. Honestly, it's hard to make a strong case against it. Both of these teams start off with a real test, but the balanced offensive attack of the Saints has me leaning towards the black and gold. Oh, also, the Vikings have some old man playing quarterback. There is no excuse to not watch this game at Bar None. The territory is split between the Vikings and the Saints and the tension runs thicker than the Guinness from the tap.
Ted: Vikings - Oddly, these squads share a bar. Bar None will be rowdy as hell on this fine Thursday evening, and by "rowdy as hell" we mean "coated with cold-weather fools, N'Awlins fools, and a whole bunch of slobbering drunk NYU kids." If that's not epic, we don't know what is. Oh, wait. We do. Brett Favre is epic. He came back because he "owed it" to the Vikings; that comment will get thrown in his face if they don't win it all. AP is epic. Problem is: he fumbles like 13 times a year and he runs too hard and too upright, so his career will be over in a flash. For now, though, he's good. So is the front four, so is Harvin, etc. Favre looks 47, is 40-ish, and plays like he's 22. It's astounding. They'll win this game on the road. Believe that. In the meantime, try to avoid the new city residents in the far corner; they could be headed to Ralphville.
Bengals @ Patriots
Cameron: Bengals - The Bengals have been gliding along under the mediocrity line for too long now. The addition of a second loudmouth maniac with a reality show could slow down or speed up the offense, but I choose the latter. Palmer was rock solid when he had more targets than just Ochocinco and that possibility returns. The Bengals could finally have the year that they deserve. There is no better place to watch the Bengals than Phebe's on the Bowery.
Ted: Patriots - What's the deal with the Pats? Is this a down year? Jets look good. Dolphins even look kinda good. Bills? HAHA! 1-15 right there. But no, really, Pats ... they've lost Ty Warren. That's a huge clog in the middle to loose. Who's their RB, Laurence Maroney? Ugh. Welker can't be 100 percent. It looks less than ideal in Beantown, but you know these fools will finish 11-5 somehow. The opener is tough: even though it's at home, this Bengals team is good. They have a legit top-10 offense and (probably) a top-10 defense. To secure yourself as a Pats fan, go to Hairy Monk. It's good for all things Boston in the cruel confines of NYC. And -- at the time NFL is opening, the Sox might be making that final push, so you've got that on a side TV too.
Panthers @ Giants
Cameron: Giants - I bleed blue, but there is no bias in this pick. The Giants lost young buck Hixon, but are plenty deep at receiver. Brandon Jacobs took a big leap back last year, but at 28, he should still have a few years in the tank, even with his overtly physical style of play. The Panthers are set at RB with their one-two punch of Williams and Stewart, but they have troubles everywhere else. Matt Moore should get the ball but Irish hothead Jimmy Claussen will fight for snaps. You can watch the Giants with like-minded fans anywhere but I like to catch it along with the wings at Dempsey's.
Ted: Panthers - Someone told me once that the definition of the scouting term "Looks like Tarzan, plays like Jane" (i.e. huge, sculpted body and no output) is Dwayne Jarrett. Check. The Panthers don't look too good, and they're in a division with the champs and the Falcons, who a lot of people have as a sleeper. Could be a rough year. Drown your sorrows at Brother Jimmy's Murray Hill; they're ACC-focused and so you get like-minded fans for ACC-area pro teams as well. I've caught a Panthers game there much by accident. It wasn't entirely fun (the game), but dang, the beers are solid.
Colts @ Texans
Cameron: Colts - This is a no brainer. The defending AFC champs have an almost identical staff from last season and in case your memory is failing, they had a pretty good season. Barring any major injuries, you should see the Colts deep into the playoffs, as it has been. Check Indy at Bar Coastal, the Upper East Side college kid standby.
Ted: Texans: This sucks for the Texans. This team has so much talent -- SO much -- but their entire downfall is the inability to win within their own division (they were like 1-7 or 2-6 there last year). So what do the NFL gods do now? They make them open with the best goddamn team in the division, the Colts. This is a loss, even in Houston. 0-1 and the train's rolling backward already to another 8-8 year with nine Pro Bowlers. Egad. There isn't really an ideal place to watch the Texans in this town. Your best bet is a bar that backs the Longhorns the day before -- likely Stout or Hill Country.
Packers @ Eagles
Cameron: Packers - I don't want to take anything away from the Packers, but this pick was made strictly for the downfall of the Eagles. McNabb held them together in more way than one and their retreat into childish trash talk towards him is evidence. They have depth at receiver and they added a bit of defense, but that is about all they have going for them. On the other hand, the Packers show all the promise in the world and in a perfect world they can take a game away from Favre this season. Check this game with your cheesehead pals at Kettle of Fish.
Ted - Eagles - Even in Philly, the Packers should win this. Even though they gave up 51 points in their playoff game last year, the Pack is a team on the verge. The Eagles are a team in transition. If Kolb is awesome, they still might be the worst team in the NFC East -- Skins look better, G-Men can recover, and Cowboys look elite. To watch Philly sports, go to Wogie's -- but honestly, by September 12th, the Phillies may be given better TV placement.
Cowboys @ Redskins
Cameron: Cowboys - While there is a changing of the guard at the Redskins camp, the Cowboys are still the Bully of the NFC East. Things seem up in the air for the whole division, which is usually a powerhouse. This game goes a long way to predict who will end up on top. The 'boys have all the same weapons and just because the 'skins have McNabb, Shanahan, and the world's laziest football player, it's no reason to throw out what we've learned over the past five years. The best place to cheer with your Texas brethren is among the sublime BBQ of Hill Country.
Ted: Redskins - Looks like a nice new era here. McNabb. Shanahan. Fat Albert being petulant. Yay. We'd recommend Red Sky for this one simple reason: the Sunday night game is brutally paced. BRUTALLY PACED. It never ends before 12:30 with the commercials and all that. At least places in midtown are near a shiteload of trains, so you can get back closer to the Monday rat race earlier rather than 2-3am. Funny story about Red Sky, too: we went in there once and were talking it up with some of the bar-rats regarding the Skins, since it claims to be a Skins bar. One of the dudes had never heard of Darrell Green. That was sad, but then another dude slapped him upside the head. In a strange way, it made us feel better. Go DeAngelo Hall.
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